Pass Through the Waters

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:2

February 14, 2022 marks the 29th anniversary of the death of our six-month old son, Brock. It seems like yesterday and 100 years ago all at the same time. Here is an excerpt from the first draft of Chapter One of Breathless Haste where Jay is reflecting on this difficult part of our story.

“The grief of losing a child is the hardest of times, a crushing pain followed by long months of walking through each day as if in a fog. It makes everything feel heavier, straining even your closest relationships with your spouse and even with God. Rebecca and I soon discovered that we approached grief very differently. I had more experience with loss, but it had seemingly taught me very little. When I felt sad my inclination was not to discuss it, but instead to go into my shell. I just wanted to pull the covers over my head or be alone. The last thing I wanted to do was to lean into the pain of my emotions, to weep even with Rebecca. I did what I had always done and stuffed it and kept trying to move forward, outwardly coping and inwardly dying.”

Jay and I are thankful that God was with us for the past 29 years as we passed through the waters.